He promised a wine
bar. When she got there he said they should go somewhere else, something about
the noise and the lovely day and the heat. Of course he wasn’t dressed
appropriately (kaki shorts for a date, really?) but she was. They walked. He
commented something about her attire and how funky or something it was. She
dismissed his comment.
They ended up in a
coffee house. Coffee? Really? Instead of wine? Well, she thought, let him do,
let’s see were this gets us.
It is usually the
first 5-10 minutes in a first date, that’s when you know its going to be
another disaster and you just stay for the anecdote. Bad dates make the best
anecdotes.
They ordered
bruschettas. He said something about his tomato, no salt he said. But when they
came there was some vinegar on top of them. He got angry, she said she would
eat them while the waiter brought some others.
“The thing is, what I
simply cannot stand, is if I ask a question and the other person asks in
return, why? I find that disgusting…”
“Disgusting? “ she
asked, “That’s a strong word.”
“Yes, disgusting.
Because if I ask a question, I want an answer. If you don’t want to answer,
just say so, but don’t ask why… “ he was turning aggressive, his whole body
posture had turned towards her and was hovering over half the table. She had to
lean back just to breath. Ten minutes of this.
She smiled, half
smile. “But what if I asked you right now how much money you make… you would
ask why, you wouldn’t say it’s too personal or you don’t want to respond, would
you..?” he fell quiet. Didn’t know what to say, mumbled a bit.
“What about if I asked
you how many sex partners you’ve had, would you answer me? No, but you would
ask why? Yes, why I want to know that. Its obvious and not rude, its obvious.
Right?”
“Uhm, yeah, I guess
you are right. So some of the time asking why is not disgusting. But most of
the time it is.”
And she wanted to run
out of there but didn’t know how.
“So, have you been
married?” she asked.
“No.”
“Why?”
“I hate it when people
ask that, as if it’s not normal for a 44 year old to be single and never been
married. I haven’t found the right one. It should be more normal to never be
married like me, more people should be like me than when you meet them and they
are divorced and with a kid…”
She just nodded.
“And have you been
married?”
“Me? No.”
“And why not?” He
tried to be defiant, like her, but the question was nonsensical, especially
with that tone.
“Well, it’s not that
strange. I am 15 years younger than you.”
Silence.
“But do you believe in
marriage?”
“Do you?”
“And do you like where
you used to live? Your country?”
“Yes, do you like
yours?”
“Yes”.
“And what kind of
family do you have…”
At this point she was
beyond exasperated, “this is not a job interview, so stop interviewing me. I am
not applying for a job. We can talk, we can chat, but stop interviewing me.”
The date continued.
She planned her escape.
When he returned from
the restroom he asked about other dates she had gone on from the same website.
“Oh, that’s where I’ve
had some of the worst dates of my life.”
“Really?”
“Yes. But it’s ok. I
write about them.”
His eyes wider
than his mouth.
“Don’t worry, its just
for me. I don’t publish them.”
Little did he know.
Thank god the check had come and gone. They parted ways half a block later.
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